'It takes a special woman' to be a doula

By Cheryl Rossi-Staff writer

When Stacy Calogero had her second child, she attended a group meeting for women and new babies. One new mother after another shared stories of giving birth, and all the stories were of horrible experiences. When it was her turn, Calogero toned down what had been for her a wonderful moment of giving birth. But she couldn't hide her true self.

On her way out, the community health nurse who organized the meeting suggested Calogero become a doula, a woman who provides emotional and physical support to women and their partners during pregnancy and labour.

"She picked up the sense of being very nurturing," Calogero said.

The following year, Calogero jumped at the chance to become a volunteer doula with the South Community Birth Program.

She joined 18 other prospective doulas to receive four days of free Doula Organization of North America, or DONA International, training. They studied the stages of delivery, the pros and cons of pain medications, forceps, vacuums and Caesarean sections, the function of each delivery room machine and various massage techniques.

DONA-certified doulas who have assisted at a minimum of 20 births observed the fledgling doulas at three births. The South Community Birth Program's doula coordinator, Jalana Grant, gave them full evaluations.

Some discovered being in the delivery room wasn't for them.

"It takes a special kind of a woman who wants to support other women in childbirth," Grant said. "The most important thing I think is her heart, like if she's coming with the heart of wanting to support women and the desire to be there for them and put their own lives on hold."

Grant, a doula for 22 years, said according to American studies the average doula earns less than $12,000 per year. "You can only take on so many clients," she said, adding that most doulas are volunteers.

Doulas with the South Community Birth Program receive a $250 honorarium for each birth.

Calogero usually meets a woman two or three times before labour, including at least one time at the client's home so she can find it in the middle of the night if she needs to.

In October, Calogero had clients due Oct. 1, Oct. 8 and Oct. 22, but they all went into labour around the same time.

"I spent 50-somewhat hours at the hospital. One day all three were there," she said.

Despite her overflowing schedule, she still made it home in time catch a quick nap, go out for dinner and see Mamma Mia! "I danced my little heart out," she said.

Although Calogero has considered training to be a midwife, it isn't something she's prepared to do at this point, noting she had attended one birth that lasted more than three days.

"That was a really long stretch away from the family," said Calogero, who has a six-year-old girl and three-year-old boy.

"You have to have a very supportive partner for this," she said, adding she must keep her schedule clear for two weeks on either side of an estimated due date. "So we can't take off to the Island or Whistler. I'm on call. I have a pager that's on 24/7 and, like I said, there's been times where in the middle of the night I'm out the door and I have to go."

Calogero doesn't have any clients at the moment because she's expecting her third child in February. She's participating in the South Community Birth Program as a client and has a doula of her own.

"I want to be spoiled," she says. "Why not? We deserve the royal treatment."

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